The best company you can have is your own.
I love my own company.
If you have been reading my blog you will know that I a married with a son. I love spending time with my family and wouldn’t be without them, but I also love spending time on my own.
Coming home from work and everyone being out is not a disappointment to me. I know I will see them later, they will be home. Having some time alone – priceless.
I find it hard to understand people who cannot be in their own company for five minutes before claiming they are bored, lonely and in need of company. I know many people like this and in some ways I feel sorry for them. What makes their own company so terrible that they cannot be happy if left by themselves. Is it because they cannot distract themselves from their worries, or are they worried about loved ones that are away from them. Anxious until they return?
Being on my own gives me a chance to do whatever I feel like doing without being concerned about what the rest of the family is up to. “Me time” I might choose to take a nap, watch T.V, read a book, meditate or perhaps curl up and read a book. I might decide to eat fishfinger sandwiches, bags of chips or ice cream. I might drink wine or stick to tea. Whatever I decide to do, I do without questions, without judgement, without guilt.
Many will say this is the introvert in me. These are typical introvert behaviours. I agree. Whist I would do all these things around my family, I would not feel the same. Deep down I would be conscious that I might get interrupted or even judged and this would ruin my “Me time”. As anyone with introvert tendencies would know this is a big deal!
Having a balance.
Now as I said, I love spending time with my family. I look forward to weekends, especially those that we have no plans at all. However, I am often “surprised” with nights out arranged with friends, dinner plans or company to the house. As an Introvert I don’t like surprises and I don’t need my weekends full of other people. I like my own company and that of my family. I do enjoy time with friends, I am not a complete hermit. However I go to the “surprise” night outs and often enjoy them, as I understand relationships are give and take. But sometimes I really am just looking at the time wondering when we will be home.
Does that make me sad, strange, boring, unsociable? Perhaps in some people’s eyes. But in mine, in means I am happy in my own company and with my family. I don’t NEED others to make me happy.
It’s ok to say NO!
As I have got older, I am a bit more stubborn and sometimes say ‘No” to these unexpected plans even if it upsets others. I do it to get the message across that I don’t like surprises! The message does seem to be working as I now get asked most of the time before plans are made and I am learning to be honest if I really do not want to do something on a particular night.
If you are someone that finds it difficult to spend time alone, or is always the person that has to be around others, there is nothing wrong with that, but it must exhausting. Try taking a few hours to yourself, no agenda, no list of things to do. Just see what you feel like doing and do it. Watch re runs of LOST or the game highlights. Paint a picture. Surf the net. Dance to your favorites songs – yes, alone in your front room. Be crazy, be quiet, be eccentric, nobody cares. Just enjoy your own company!